Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to
lights and darks.
Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do
more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah,
wide loofah and pumice stone.
Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins.(more...)
I got this bulletin Friday night from my friend Les and I laughed for about 10 minutes, so I decided to share it, drunken old skool pic and all!
i go to work….i make things out of metal welding all fuckin day long till my goddamned eyes bleed….i come home and pick up my guitar and work on metal passages that will make you fall down bleeding…….my eyes are so burnt out that i cant see in sunlight…..so i need shelter from the sun like a fuckin vampire……….im so metal….its retarded how metal i am………….I AM METAL.
A Swedish heavy metal fan has had his musical preferences officially classified as a disability. The results of a psychological analysis enable the metal lover to supplement his income with state benefits.
Roger Tullgren, 42, from Hässleholm in southern Sweden has just started working part time as a dishwasher at a local restaurant.
Because heavy metal dominates so many aspects of his life, the Employment Service has agreed to pay part of Tullgren’s salary. His new boss meanwhile has given him a special dispensation to play loud music at work.
“I have been trying for ten years to get this classified as a handicap,” Tullgren told The Local.
“I spoke to three psychologists and they finally agreed that I needed this to avoid being discriminated against.”
Do you ever feel a trip to your boss’s office is like a trip to a foreign country? Nice view, but no speaka dee English? In order to ensure that none of the buck passing, put- downing, or one- upping is lost in translation, make sure to bring along this cheat sheet so you know what the big enchilada is really trying to say.
“Great job on the report!”
Translation: “I’m taking credit for your work.”(more…)
My name is Shawn and I live in Westbrook, Maine. I'm an artist, music snob, heckler, ENFP, omnivore, GenXer, Blogger, reluctant adult, Twitter & Blip.fm addict, & all around sarcastic shithead. I enjoy food, music, humor, and all things bizarre/nerdy. Welcome!